A beautiful reminder

[Sorry for the delayed blog; I'm working full days now and have been running low on steam this week.]

Have you ever had a profound experience in your life (good or bad) when you've told yourself that you will NEVER forget how you felt at that moment? But then time passed and the beautiful chaos of life evolves, quickly eroding your memory?

It's similar to the time Mark and I took a trip alone to Negril, Jamaica. It was amazing. We made no plans. We did only what we wanted every day for a week. My only rule was "no rum before dinner". LOL. Anyway, after a few days, I actually felt my pulse rate slow down. I told Mark there was something wrong with me because everything about me had slowed down. Maybe I was getting sick, or maybe it was the effect of sleeping one balcony above pot smokers. Then I realized that this was what relaxation was supposed to feel like. One afternoon, I found myself dozing off on our veranda while listening to a tropical rainstorm pass over us. The air was warm and breezy, and the sound of the rain and wind dancing through the trees was intoxicating. Just before I fell asleep, I thought, "I'll always remember this feeling." ........ Three days later, I found myself back in Indy at work, leading an all-day meeting, with a room that was poorly equipped, participants that didn't even like each other let alone want to spend the entire day together in an 8X15 room, and deadlines weighing down on us like the future of the company was in our hands. I had the onset of a migraine and was in a foul mood. My boss at the time (the charming man that he is), said something like, "Wow, that vacation happy face didn't last long." It took me a few seconds (after contemplating ways to make him experience severe pain) to remember how I'd felt only three days earlier. How quickly we forget!

I found myself in that room again this week, leading the meeting, fixing the equipment, and fighting off the urge to be cranky. Then, I received a wonderful reminder....

A good friend of mine left a card for me that I read this morning. She reminded me of the amazing blessings and miracles I've experienced over the past six months. She reminded me that there were reasons for what has happened. She reminded me, most importantly, that God can use these experiences to witness to others. After reading her lovely letter, I went into another high-stakes meeting and forgot all about it (see a pattern w/ me??). I had to excuse myself from the meeting to go to the neurologist because of the ongoing headaches. I didn't want to go and even considered canceling, but I went.

The doctor spent a lot of time talking to me about SCD. He was amazed to have a patient w/ this syndrome in his office. (I guess I've become somewhat of a circus freak w/ physicians.) He wanted to know EVERYTHING. How was I diagnosed? How long had I experienced symptoms? You could hear what?? I told him about Johns Hopkins, Dr. Ostrowski, the patient w/ SCD 5 miles from my house, everything. He was fascinated. He told me I was lucky. I said I was blessed. He told me he couldn't believe it and I told him that it was beyond understanding and a true miracle. Then I remembered my friend's note. She was right. One of the reasons this has happened is so that I can remind others of the miracles around us - the ones we often forget. I won't forget to continue sharing with him. I now have a reason to go back. He wants to see me a few times and also wants to learn more about SCD. I'm hoping to teach him even more than that. It's something I'll be happy to remember to do.

Don't feel guilty if you forget sometimes. That's natural. But just don't forget permanently. Don't be like Peter from Hook and forget where you've been, because where you've been is part of who you are, and who you are is the only you that God ever created to walk this Earth. Feel blessed for it.