So, I didn't really grow up with the Waltons or the Cleavers. You could say that the Hallams were more like the Simpsons. We got a lot of things wrong. But one thing that we got right was forgiveness. It was a trait that my parents instilled in us at a very young age. Perhaps it's because we made so many mistakes. I'm not sure. But I somehow grew up without the ability to hold a grudge. I do get angry - very angry at times - but once someone has asked for forgiveness, it's nearly impossible for me to say no. It's definitely come in handy in my marriage, in friendships, and with my family. I guess you could say that I've just always understood that most mistakes - even big ones - are done without malice and that the people making the mistakes are as flawed as me. And since God has found a way to erase all the crap I've pulled, I should give a few breaks now and then too, right?
Here's the thing.....holding a grudge doesn't really hurt anyone but you. In most cases, the other person doesn't even know that you're daydreaming about the 101 ways you could wipe their existence off the planet. However, that grudge eats away at who you are, making it difficult to trust the people who love you most.
There really aren't many areas of my life that I feel comfortable giving out strong advice. Sure, I play around with it in this blog, but most of the tips I've used in my marriage and friendships have come from scripture, wise friends, and my own mistakes. Very little comes from my wisdom. Trust me on this one. Let it go. Give them and yourself a break. You'll be amazed at how much lighter your load is.
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